ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
