Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
