"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
