To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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