Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
