He kissed a someone with a penis
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
