Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
