I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
