Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
