I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
