My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
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