Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Blood and glitter go together right?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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