:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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