sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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