You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
