Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
