so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
