Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
