is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
