I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
