We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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