hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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