his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
