I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
