i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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