I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
this will be a night to untag.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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