she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
