he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
