I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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