we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
