Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Randomize
