he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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