Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
