All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
