He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
