I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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