i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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