we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Less talking, more tequila
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
