Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
