Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
