Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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