I am in a vortex of obligation.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
