Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
