Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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