we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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