I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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