I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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