dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
