I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize