He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He better not be in your backpack
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
